Groovey TV

The Cabin in the Woods Review

(By Meli) Run there’s a herd of zombies trying to kill us!    Ugh!    If you are looking for another cliche horror flick this is the movie for you.    There is one interesting twist, but it wasn’t enough to hold my interest.    As with most of these movies you have the jock, this time his name is Curt (Chris Hemsworth), the slut, Jules (Anna Hutchinson), the virgin/nerd, Dana (Kristen Connolly), and last but not least, the stoner, Marty (Fran Kranz).    Obviously they all decide to get away and go to a cabin….you guessed it, in the woods.    In addition to these college students the story moves to a group of “˜yes men’ in a control room.    One of which is Hadley (Bradley Whitford).    This is a big name and I was surprised and delighted when I saw him!    The delight soon faded as the movie went on.    He is one of the bad/good guys.    Why do I say that?    Well, he’s running the show and trying to help kill the college kids.    At the same time he is trying to save all of humanity.    Sounds like a lot to swallow doesn’t it?    I thought so, and lets face it the story line about the kids in Japan or China just seemed misplaced.    As you can tell I can’t even remember which country it was.

All in all it’s a horror flick with lots of blood, running, screaming, and one or two moments that might scare some movie goers.    I especially liked the moment Curt tried to jump his motorcycle over the ravine.    If you haven’t seen it yet, lets just say it was very Tron-like.    And for the first time in a horror movie, that I’ve seen, smoking a ton of weed helped save a life.    That’s right boys and girls, you read it correctly.    Put down the bong and read it again if you must.    So how did all this happen?    Well it’s a choose your own adventure kind of thing.    Only in this case it’s a choose your own death.    The kids are lured into the basement with a ton of relics and artifacts.    By reading a verse from a girls diary zombies are brought to life in search of blood.    There were other life ending relics in the basement, but we didn’t get the luxury of hearing all about them.  As the movie goes on and people die, we find ourselves watching the stoner and the virgin fight together to save their lives.  The stoner actually finds his way into the complex that is housing all sorts of evil and the control room of death.    At this point I found myself flashing back to the movie The Cube.    If you’ve seen it you know what I’m referring to.    If you haven’t…well you are out of luck.

Near the end of the movie there is a literal blood bath. I’m talking all sorts of beasts, weird people and all things one could imagine to cause death and dismemberment.    By this point in the film I was laughing.    It was so absurd to me that I just couldn’t help it.    Some might call this movie genius for it’s plot twist.    In fact, I’ve read quite a few good reviews, but to each his own.    This reviewer found most of it predictable and cliche.    The twist was cool in it’s own way as was the addition of Sigourny Weaver as The Director.    LOVE Sigourny Weaver!    All in all it had some big names, some not so big names and a few ideas that were good, but poorly executed.    I expected more from Writer and Producer Joss Whedon.    I wanted to see this movie in the theater when it first came out and heard great things about how different it was and blah blah blah.    Well, it didn’t live up to the hype and I’m glad I didn’t waste my money in the theater.

Like this Article? Share it!

About The Author

I sit next to people with famousosity and try to make them laugh.

Leave A Response